How To Shift Your Thinking: A Story Inspired by Garth Brooks "The River"

Some stories stay with you forever, not just because of what happened, but because of what they awakened in you.

This is one of those stories. It starts with a song that became my anchor and my anthem: Garth Brooks’ “The River.”

At 19, I made a life-changing decision that set me on a new course, guided by lyrics that reminded me to be a dreamer, to trust the current, and to keep going.

In sharing it with you, I’ll also introduce the STEAM Method, a self-coaching structure I use today to face fear, take action, and live a life that truly flows.

Just like the song says, life is not a destination; it’s a journey. And this was where mine really began.

The Journey Begins

I was 19 years old, behind the wheel of my Ford Festiva, packed with everything I owned. I had just left Iowa. I left my hometown, my family, my comfort zone, and headed to Ohio to start a new chapter of life. I didn’t know what waited for me on the other end. No job. No direction. Just the pull of a dream that whispered, “There’s more waiting for you… if you’re brave enough to go find it.”

The road stretched out in front of me like an invitation, and a challenge. Every mile I drove felt like a small act of courage. And through the crackling speakers of my Festiva’s radio, one song played on repeat: The River by Garth Brooks.

“Too many times we stand aside and let the water slip away, till what we put off till tomorrow has now become today. So don’t you sit upon the shoreline and say you’re satisfied. Choose to chance the rapids, and dare to dance the tide.”

Those lyrics didn’t just accompany me on the road, they became a soundtrack to my transformation. With every repeat, they settled deeper into my bones, offering comfort, encouragement, and a nudge toward courage. At that time in my life, I didn’t have a roadmap or a mentor guiding me. What I did have was a strong desire to travel and a willingness to face the fears standing in my way.

Looking back, that road trip was about far more than geography. It marked the beginning of a mindset shift, one that would shape the way I face challenges for the rest of my life. It taught me that the only thing standing between the life I have and the life I want is usually… my own thinking.

I want to share that story with you and show you how you can begin shifting your mindset, too. I’ll walk you through the exact self-coaching structure I use today to manage fear, take aligned action, and live a life that’s deeply fulfilling. It’s called the STEAM Structure, and it all started with a song, a drive, and a choice to dance the tide.

The Power of a Song

There’s something magical about how a song can reach into your soul and speak the words you didn’t even know you needed to hear.

For me, The River by Garth Brooks wasn’t just background noise on a long road trip. It became a message from the universe, disguised as music. I played it over and over as I drove through miles of unfamiliar landscape, feeling the weight of uncertainty and the thrill of possibility. I didn’t have the language for it then, but I was in the middle of a mindset shift, and those lyrics were the lifeline pulling me through.

“Too many times we stand aside and let the water slip away,
Till what we put off till tomorrow has now become today.”

Those words hit me hard. How often had I done just that? Put things off. Waited for the “right time.” Let fear whisper reasons why I wasn’t ready yet. I realized I had spent years standing on the shoreline of my own dreams, watching opportunities drift past because I was afraid to wade in.

And then came the next part:

“So don’t you sit upon the shoreline and say you’re satisfied
Choose to chance the rapids and dare to dance the tide.”

That lyric felt like a personal dare.

Was I really satisfied with playing small, sticking to the familiar, and letting life pass me by?

Or was I ready to chance the rapids, even if it meant getting uncomfortable?

That’s the power of music. It bypasses the logical mind and goes straight to the heart. It helps us feel things we didn’t know we needed to feel. In that moment, I knew the move I was making wasn’t just a relocation. It was a declaration: I was no longer going to wait on the shoreline. I was going to start taking bold, imperfect action, even if it scared me.

And let’s be honest, change is always scary. But when you have a soundtrack that speaks your truth, you realize you’re not alone. Someone else has felt this too. And if they can navigate the current, so can you.

Looking back now, I see that song as the catalyst for something bigger. It opened the door to a new way of thinking, and that’s where real change begins.

The Real Reason We Stay Stuck

Most people don’t stay stuck because they lack desire. We all want more out of life; more joy, more adventure, more purpose. We dream about the move, the job, the relationship, the trip, the business idea. We even talk about it with friends or scribble it down in a journal.

But then… we hesitate. We pause. We overthink.
And the water slips away.

Why?
It’s not the lack of a plan. It’s not a lack of resources.
It’s our thinking.

Our thoughts have more power than we give them credit for. They shape our emotions, fuel our actions, or inactions, and ultimately create the results we live with every single day.

When I was sitting in Iowa, thinking about moving to Ohio, my mind flooded with doubt:

What if I fail?
What if I hate it there?
What if I can’t find a job or make friends?
Who do I think I am to just up and leave everything behind?

These weren’t just innocent questions. They were fear-based thoughts disguised as logic, and they were paralyzing me.

Here’s the thing: we don’t avoid change because we’re lazy or incapable. We avoid change because our brains are wired for survival, not growth. The unknown feels dangerous. And when our thoughts are rooted in fear, we naturally feel anxious, defeated, intimidated, or overwhelmed.

And those emotions? They drive us to shrink back, procrastinate, distract ourselves, or abandon the goal altogether.

The river keeps flowing, and we stay standing on the shoreline, convincing ourselves we’re just “waiting for the right time.”

But here’s what I want you to hear:
It’s not your fault.
It’s just how the mind works until you learn how to work with it.

You don’t have to beat yourself up for the opportunities you didn’t take or the times you let fear take the wheel. What matters most is what you do next. And that starts with awareness.

Because once you become aware of your thoughts, you can start to change them. You can shift from “What if I fail?” to “What if this is the best decision I ever make?” You can shift from inaction to intentional momentum.

So how do you do that?
You use a mindset tool that helps you untangle fear, get clear on what’s really going on, and take back control. I call it the STEAM Self-Coaching Structure, and it’s what you’re going to start learning about next. It’s a tool that can change your life, just as it changed mine.

How To Manage Your Thinking – The STEAM Self-Coaching Structure

If your thoughts shape your emotions, your emotions influence your actions, and your actions create your results… Then learning to manage your thinking is everything.

The truth is, we all have patterns. Repeating loops of thoughts and feelings that shape how we experience life. The good news? You don’t have to stay stuck in them. You can coach yourself through them, shift your perspective, and choose differently.

That’s where the STEAM Structure comes in.

STEAM is a simple yet powerful self-coaching framework I created to help you become more aware of what’s really happening in your inner world, so you can make aligned changes in your outer world. Here’s what it stands for:

S – Situations

These are the neutral events happening in your life. A move. A job change. A conversation. An unexpected bill. A breakup. A travel destination. The situation is just the facts until your brain adds meaning to it.

Example:
Situation: “I’m moving to a new state.”
That’s all it is. No emotion. No story. Just a fact.

But our brains don’t stop there. That’s where the next part comes in.

T – Thoughts

Thoughts are the sentences your brain tells you about the situation. These are your interpretations, beliefs, assumptions, or stories.

Example:
Thoughts: “This is terrifying. I’m going to fail. I’m not ready.”

Now the situation isn’t just a move, it’s a personal test of worth, survival, or identity. Thoughts are powerful. They’re what drives how we feel.

E – Emotions

Your emotions are how you feel in response to your thoughts, not the situation itself.

Example:
From the thought “I’m going to fail,” you might feel:
Fear. Doubt. Anxiety. Shame. Overwhelm.

Emotions are important because they drive what we do next. That brings us to:

A – Actions

This is where your thinking becomes visible. Your actions (or inactions) flow from your emotions.

Example:
Feeling afraid, you might avoid packing, delay the move, obsess over backup plans, or look for reasons to stay where you are. You can also start to notice recurring behaviors: withdrawing, procrastinating, overthinking, or abandoning goals mid-way through. These aren’t flaws. They’re feedback. They’re showing you how you’re feeling and thinking behind the scenes.

M – Map

This is the life you’re creating. The reality that emerges when all the above loops together. Your map is made up of patterns. Repeating experiences. Similar results. When you step back and look at the bigger picture, you’ll start to see: this isn’t random.

Your map might look like:

“I never follow through.”
“I always play it safe.”
“I want more, but I stay stuck.”

Or, if you begin to shift your thinking:

“I take brave action even when I feel scared.”
“I trust myself to figure things out.”
“I make decisions aligned with who I want to become.”

Using STEAM in Real Life

Let’s go back to that 19-year-old version of me, in the Ford Festiva, blasting Garth Brooks and doubting everything.

Here’s what my STEAM looked like:

Situation: I’m moving to Ohio.
Thought: What if I can’t find my way?
Emotion: Fear
Action: I kept driving, but I was white-knuckling it emotionally.
Map: I was choosing growth, but I was still letting fear lead the way.

Now, imagine I had used STEAM intentionally:

Situation: I’m moving to Ohio.
New Thought: This is the start of something amazing and I’m figuring it out.
Emotion: Hope
Action: I drive with purpose, start making plans, and seek out connections.
Map: A confident, empowered version of me starts taking shape.

This is the power of intentional thinking. This is the power of managing your mindset. This is the power of STEAM self-coaching.

And now, it’s your turn.

Try It For Yourself: Your STEAM Self-Coaching Exercise

Pick a situation you’re currently facing. Something that feels stressful, uncertain, or stuck.
Write it down factually. No drama, just the situation itself.
Write out your thought about it. Be honest. What is your brain telling you?
Identify the emotion those thoughts create. Name them.
Notice your actions (or inactions) that result from those emotions.
Step back and look at the map you’re creating. What kind of life is this building?

Then ask yourself:

What do I want to believe instead?
How would that change how I feel and act?
What kind of life would I be creating with that new map?

This is how mindset shifts begin. Not with a giant leap, but with a new way of seeing and thinking about the world around you.

What it Means to “Dance the Tide”

When I first heard Garth Brooks sing, “Choose to chance the rapids and dare to dance the tide,” I thought it was just poetic. But now, years later, I understand: it’s a mindset. A lifestyle. A commitment to yourself and your growth.

To “dance the tide” means you stop waiting for perfect conditions. You stop standing still while life flows past you. You start showing up – scared, unsure, messy, fearful – and take action anyway.

It means:

Trusting yourself, even when the outcome isn’t guaranteed.
Saying “yes” to opportunities, even when they stretch you.
Letting go of the old map and rewriting your path, one brave move at a time.

And most of all, it means learning to lead with your thinking instead of your fear.

Dancing the tide doesn’t mean you won’t face waves. You will. Life has a way of tossing you into the unknown again and again. But when you have the tools to manage your thinking, you don’t have to panic or freeze or abandon your goals. You can ride the current. You can move with the momentum. You can create something beautiful, even in uncertainty.

For me, that cross-state move at 19 was just the beginning.

Since then, I’ve faced many rapids, new careers, big decisions, hard endings, and exciting beginnings. And I’ve faced fear every single time. But because I’ve learned how to shift my thinking, I no longer let that fear decide for me.

And you can do the same.

Signs You’re Ready to Dance the Tide

You might be ready to dance the tide if:

You’re tired of playing it safe.
You feel stuck, but you know something more is calling.
You’re done with fear making your decisions.
You’re craving forward momentum, even if you don’t know exactly what that looks like.

If that’s you, here’s your invitation: Start with one thought.

You don’t have to change your whole life overnight. But you can change one thought today. And that thought can change how you feel. Which changes how you show up. Which changes your entire trajectory.

That’s the ripple effect of mindset and thought work.
That’s what it means to be the kind of person who doesn’t just float through life, but who dances with it.

We Are All Standing On A Shoreline

The truth is, every single one of us is standing at some shoreline.

Maybe for you, it’s the decision to make a move, change your career, start a relationship, leave a relationship, launch something new, or simply believe in yourself again.

Whatever that shoreline looks like…
You get to decide whether you stay put, watching the water rush by,
Or whether you choose to chance the rapids and dare to dance the tide.

I didn’t have it all figured out when I drove across state lines with Garth Brooks on repeat. I was nervous. Unsure. But somewhere inside, I knew: the river of life doesn’t wait. And if I wanted to grow, I had to move, even if I didn’t know where the current would take me.

That choice, to say yes to the unknown, set me on a path I’m still traveling.
And every single meaningful step since then has been rooted in one thing: managing my thinking.

Your Next Steps: Try STEAM today

If you’re ready to stop letting fear call the shots, try this:

Grab a journal.
Choose one area of your life that feels stuck, heavy, or uncertain.
Walk yourself through the STEAM Structure:
- Situation: What’s happening?
- Thoughts: What are you thinking about that situation?
- Emotions: How does that thought make you feel?
- Actions: What are you doing or not doing? What are you avoiding?
- Map: What result are you creating in your life?
Ask yourself:
- What do I want to think instead?
- How would that shift my emotion, action, and outcome?

Start small. One situation. One mindset shift. One dance with the tide.
And celebrate it! Because it means you’re no longer letting life pass you by. You’re stepping into it, fully present, fully aware, and fully you.

You’re Not Alone On The River

Remember: this work isn’t about perfection. It’s about practice.
Managing your thinking and your mindset is a daily choice. A courageous one. And the more you lean in, the more confidence you’ll build. Not because everything suddenly feels easy, but because you know how to navigate whatever comes next.

So here’s my gentle nudge to you:

Play the song.
Feel the fear.
Write out your STEAM.
Take one brave action.
And trust that the river will rise to meet you.

Because this? This is your life.
And it’s meant to be lived, not watched from the shoreline.

Final Thoughts: It’s Time To Change Your Thinking

Your journey may not look like mine, and it’s not meant to. But the current that calls you forward, that quiet tug toward something more, is universal. Whether you’re standing at the start of something new or facing a decision that feels uncertain, you have the power to choose your course. The STEAM Structure is simply a way to help you listen to yourself more clearly, steer with confidence, and stay aligned with what matters most. So take the first step. Trust your inner compass. And remember, as Garth Brooks sings, “Don’t you sit upon the shoreline and say you’re satisfied… choose to chance the rapids and dare to dance the tide.” Your river is waiting. Now is the time to make your own way.

If you’re ready to begin your own mindset journey, I warmly invite you to explore the Celebrate All Wins coaching programs, where the STEAM Structure serves as the foundation for every breakthrough, mindset shift, and success story. Click here to explore the programs and start navigating your own waters.

How To Shift Your Thinking: A Story Inspired by Garth Brooks “The River”